Family Matters

To the Reader: Just to let you know. I am writing this article from my own personnel experience of 40+ years of marriage. So, there may be a few things I learned from other couples as well as what medical science has to say. However, sense they don’t violate any scripture from what as I can see, I felt that it would be safe to include them in this article. And of course, there are teachings that are taken from the bible as well. All this I did to encourage and help you the with any issues and struggles that you may encounter in your marriage. So, please read with an open mind, always seeking what God’s word has to says in all things. Therefore: “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15 KJV)

The bible does rightly proclaims that: “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” (Hebrews 13:4 EMTV) So, isn’t this passage be declaring that marriage is good and that sexual intimacy shouldn’t be viewed as dirty, defiling or unholy? However, we do know that God will judge those who commit sexual immorality. So, let us who are married embrace our union as an institution that God has created. Let’s bring him glory and honor by embracing each other whether in good times or bad, in sickness or in health, until death do us part. Amen.

“For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24 NASB20)

When talking about marriage, we must first stand on God’s word concerning what constitutes a marriage. For if we would look closely at the passage above, we would clearly see that it says that a man shall “be joined to his wife.” Then we read: “God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” (Genesis 1:28 NASB20) Therefore, any marriage relationship other than what was mentioned above would be a sinful one which God has not joined together. This would include not only homosexual relationships, but those who are committing adultery by marrying a divorced woman. More on this below.

“But if you hate her and send her away,” says the Lord God of Israel, “ungodliness will obscure your thinking,” says the Lord Almighty. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not forsake her.” (Malachi 2:16 OSB)

Marriage is meant to be for a lifetime according to God’s word. However, we can see so many marriages breaking up for one reason or another. And why is that? Are we believing the lies of Satan that says “the grass is greener on the other side of the fence?” For those who believe this will most likely never be happy with any relationship they’re in. Yes, there may be some lumps and bumps along the way. For even Paul the apostle said: “But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.” (1 Corinthians 7:28 KJV) Yes, there is can be some trying times during your marriage relationship. However, by walking after the Holy Spirit and resisting the lies of the devil, couples can make it through even the most difficult of times. For: “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13 ESV)

And finally, let’s take heed to the words that Jesus spoke to the Pharisees. For they confronted him concerning divorce and remarriage by saying: “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?" (Matthew 19:7 ESV) But what was Jesus response? Well he said: “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery." (Matthew 19:8-9 ESV) So, Jesus made it clear that marriage is to be for life. Therefore, “love the one you're with” and resist the lies that say otherwise. Amen.

“Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.” (Proverbs 5:15-19 ESV)

In that passage above, we can see that the marriage relationship should be delightful. For God created marriage and wants us not only to express our love to one another through it, but to richly enjoy it as well. Now, those of us who are married should know that the sexual act between a man and a woman can bring about the most intense physical pleasure. And it’s for a good reason. For it’s one of those pleasures of life that brings forth new life into this world. So, this being the case, doesn’t it make sense that God would make it intensely pleasurable? And let’s also remember that we ourselves are here because our parents had a sexual encounter as well.

Below are a few scriptures taken from Song of Songs showing a couple's desire for each other:

• The man speaks: “As a lily among thorns, So is my love among the daughters. (Song of Songs 2:2 ASV)
• The woman speaks: “Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. He has brought me to his banquet hall, and his banner over me is love.” (Song of Songs 2:2-4 NASB20)
• The man speaks: “A garden enclosed is my sister, my spouse, a spring shut up, a fountain sealed. Your plants are an orchard of pomegranates with pleasant fruits, fragrant henna with spikenard, spikenard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon, With all trees of frankincense, myrrh and aloes, with all the chief spices - A fountain of gardens, a well of living waters, and streams from Lebanon.” (Song of Songs 4:12-15 NKJV)
• The woman speaks: “Awake, O north wind; and come, thou south; blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits. (Song of Songs 4:16 KJV)
• The man speaks: “I am come into my garden, my sister, my spouse: I have gathered my myrrh with my spice; I have eaten my honeycomb with my honey; I have drunk my wine with my milk: eat, O friends; drink, yea, drink abundantly, O beloved.” (Song of Songs 5:1 KJV)
• The woman speaks: “My beloved is white and ruddy, the chiefest among ten thousand. His head is as the most fine gold, his locks are bushy, and black as a raven. His eyes are as the eyes of doves by the rivers of waters, washed with milk, and fitly set. His cheeks are as a bed of spices, as sweet flowers: his lips like lilies, dropping sweet smelling myrrh. His hands are as gold rings set with the beryl: his belly is as bright ivory overlaid with sapphires. His legs are as pillars of marble, set upon sockets of fine gold: his countenance is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars.” (Song of Songs 5:10-15 KJV)
• The man speaks: “How fair and how pleasant art thou, O love, for delights! This thy stature is like to a palm-tree, And thy breasts to its clusters. I said, I will climb up into the palm-tree, I will take hold of the branches thereof: Let thy breasts be as clusters of the vine, And the smell of thy breath like apples.” (Song of Songs 7:6-8) Please note: To this day there a those who help get the pollination process going by climbing up the date palms trees. For there is both a male tree as well as a female tree. Thus, by taking a portion of the male pollen, they can dust the female palm tree with it. (Song of Songs 7:6-8 KJV) So, couldn’t this be referring to a man engaging his wife in sex?

Click this link to see a video on Date Palm pollination: Click here

"All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful, but not all things build up." (1 Corinthians 10:23 LSB)

Now, from what I gather form the scriptures, I believe that what couple’s do in their bedroom should not be judge by others. For it’s true that we’re not all at the same level of faith when it comes to sexual intimacy. For some couples may limit themselves to the simple basics of sex. And on the other hand, there are those whose faith may allow them to have more freedom in the marriage bed. In either case, we need to be careful not to put a stumbling block nor a guilt trip on others.

Therefore, those who limit themselves to the simple basics shouldn’t condemn those who do otherwise. And in the same way, those who have more freedom shouldn’t criticize or look down on those who don’t. For we need to take heed to what God’s word says and leave all judgment up to God. For it’s before Him that we stand or fall; and according to his word, he will make us stand. So, wherever your faith may allow you to go, give glory and thanks to God. Amen.

• Now accept the one who is weak in faith, but not for the purpose of passing judgment on his opinions. ... Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. ... Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this - not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way. I know and am convinced in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself; but to him who thinks anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean. ... The faith which you have, have as your own conviction before God. Happy is he who does not condemn himself in what he approves. (Romans 14:1, 4, 13-14, 22 NASB95)

“Then he said to the woman, “I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16 NLT)

Now, because of Adam and Eve’s sin, troubles came into the lives of us all. And some of these issues can include couples struggling with sexual infirmities. Therefore, they would have to come up with ways to make things work for them. And as said before, I’m convinced that what couple do behind closed doors shouldn’t be judged by us. For God knows all of our struggles and issues. For as said before: “All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful, but not all things build up.” (1 Corinthians 10:23 LSB) Yes, all things that are beneficial may be lawful if it’s not restricted in God’s word. But again, only go where your faith will allow you to go.

Now, for those who are struggling with conceiving a child, don’t give up hope. For let’s remember that Abraham and his wife Sarah, as well as Zachariah and his wife Elizabeth still engaging in sex even in their old age. (Genesis 21:1-2, Luke 1:24 KJV) And we know from the bible that both these couples were finally blessed with a child. And for those couples who may never be able to have children, there’s always the option to adopt a child. So, whatever your outcome or age may be, don’t stop enjoying sex with your spouse. For God will always make a way for us, no matter what difficulties we may be facing. We just need to have faith.

I would like to point out that there are health benefits for both men and women who remain sexually active. For science studies have shown that semen may help enhance a woman’s mood. Also, there are studies that say it could help provide a safer pregnancy as well. And for the men who are sexually active, studies have shown that it could help fight-off prostate cancer as well. So, “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1 Corinthians 7:5 ESV) Therefore, I believe that married couples should keep sexually active whether they’re young newlyweds or well advanced in years.

So again, let’s keep sexually active throughout our lives.  So, if it’s beneficial for you, who are we to judge. Just make sure you’re doing it with a right frame of mind and in a way that is pleasing not only to one another, but pleasing to God our Father as well.

“Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?” (Matthew 19:4-5 KJV)

Now, there are studies showing that it may be possible for a woman to receive a man's DNA during sex. They also mention about the possibility of the components of his semen being within her blood stream a few hours after receiving it. (see the links below for these studies). That would make the words of Jesus above not just some metaphor but an actual fact. Also, studies have shown that semen could help lessen the chances of a miscarriage. Therefore, we need to do our homework and be diligent, not only by studying God's word, but to do some research on what science and medical studies have to say as well.

Below is some helpful information concerning sex. These are based on medical studies showing not only the benefits for both the man and the woman, but for any future children (including the one in the womb) as well. Now, some of the information below may be uncomfortable for some of you. So, I’m in no way pushing this information on anyone, but only letting you know what some medical studies have to say. So, if you conscience is raising red flags and telling you to stay away, then don’t go there. Therefore, only go where you conscience will allow you to go.

• Mood Enhancer
• Women receive and retain male DNA through sex - Article 1
• Women receive and retain male DNA through sex - Video
• Sex for a safer pregnancy - Article 1
• Sex for a safer pregnancy - Article 2
• Ejaculation Frequency for a healthy prostate
• Sex for Older Couples

As mentioned at the beginning, the marriage relationship should be one that consists of love and pleasure for both the man and woman. For again, God does “giveth us richly all things to enjoy.” (1Timathy 6:17 KJV) However, we shouldn’t be so wrapped up in ourselves that we forget that there is a world who desperately needs Jesus. For Paul reminds us of this by saying: “But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away.” (1 Corinthians 7:29-31 NKJV) Yes, there is a world of people out there who need to be saved. Amen.

God bless you as you seek to do His will.

Below are some other Christian websites and articles on sex and marital intimacy. Again, there may be some of you who view the content as expectable. So again, only go where your conscience allows you to go (yes, I know that I’m repeating this a lot).

• theforgivenwife.com
• daveandashley.com
• Sex in Marriage
• Intimacy in Marriage

(Note: Below are versions used in this article to assist you in your study of God's word:

• ESV = The Holy Bible, English Standard Version copyright © 2001, 2007, 2011, 2016 by Crossway Books and Bibles, a Publishing Ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
• NKJV = New King James Version, © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. All rights reserved.
• NASB20 = New American Standard Bible 2020 Copyright (c) 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, Calif. All rights reserved.
• NASB95 = Copyright (c) 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, Calif. All rights reserved.
• ASV = Thomas Nelson & Sons first published the American Standard Version in 1901. This translation of the Bible is in the public domain.
• LSB = Legacy Standard Bible, Copyright ©2021 by The Lockman Foundation, All rights reserved. Managed in partnership with Three Sixteen Publishing Inc.
• NLT = Holy Bible, New Living Translation copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
• OSB = Orthodox Study Bible. Copyright © 2008 by St. Athanasius Academy of Orthodox Theology.
• EMTV = Copyright © 2002-2003 by Paul W. Esposito. All rights reserved.
• KJV = Published in 1769; public domain.

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"Then God said, “Let Us make mankind in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the livestock and over all the earth, and over every crawling thing that crawls on the earth.” So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:26-27 NASB20)

From the creation account above, I do believe that there was a natural unity and harmony between the man and the woman. And there in the garden, we can see from God’s word that man was a vegetarian and ate from the fruit trees and vegetables as well. Also, we can see that there was no fear between man and the animals. But most of all, it was that beautiful relationship that man had with God. For Adam and Eve were not yet tainted by the evil desires of sin.

Now for starters, I would like to be clear and say that both the man and the woman are created in God’s image as quoted above. So, this shows that both the man and the woman are equal in nature. For: “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28). However, there are differences between our God given roles that he bestowed upon us. For in nature itself, we can see that the males are generally larger and stronger than the females. This would naturally place the males in a place of dominance and rule over the females. But again, this is not inferring that one is better than the other.

"To the woman he said, “I will greatly increase your labor pains; with pain you will give birth to children. You will want to control your husband, but he will dominate you.” (Genesis 3:16 NET)

According to that passage above, we see that the woman’s desire is now to control her husband. We can see this same wording in chapter 4 of Genesis where we read: “Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry, and why is your expression downcast? Is it not true that if you do what is right, you will be fine? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at the door. It desires to dominate you, but you must subdue it.” (Genesis 4:6-7 NET) So we can see from these two passages that there is going to be a wrong desire to have ones will and way over another?

Therefore, I believe this is not about a sexual desire that a woman has for husband. But instead, it’s her desire to control and dominate her husband, just as sin wants to dominate control us. Because let’s remember that God told Adam and Eve to be “fruitful and multiply” before the fall. So, it’s reasonable to assume that Eve already had a natural sexual desire toward Adam. Therefore, because of the fall, the woman may challenge the man’s rightful place of headship over her. However, God’s word clearly says: “Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.” (1 Timothy 2:11-14 ESV)

So, let’s be diligent to stand on the truth of God’s Word. For we shouldn’t try to water it down with our own theology or feelings. Because there seems to be this urge to twist or bend scripture in such a way that it would be appealing to all. (2 Peter 3:15-16) And why is this? Could it be because we’re so afraid of offending others? And It’s no wonder why we have such disorder in the church today as well as in our homes? It’s time we stand up for the truth of God’s Word and take our rightful places in life. This should be true for both the man and the woman and their children as well. Because for us to do otherwise would be a disobedience to God’s divine commandment. Amen.

Below are a few passages concerning the roles of the man and woman:

• But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. (1 Corinthians 11:3 NASB20)
• Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:22-24 NIV)
• A woman must quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness. But I do not allow a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man, but to remain quiet. For it was Adam who was first created, and then Eve. And it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a wrongdoer. (1 Timothy 2:11-14 NASB20)
• Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward - arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror. (1 Peter 3:1-6 NKJV)
• Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (1 Peter 3:7 NKJV)
• Commentary References:If man had not sinned, he would always have ruled with wisdom and love; and, if the woman had not sinned, she would always have obeyed with humility and meekness; and then the dominion would have been no grievance: but our own sin and folly make our yoke heavy. If Eve had not eaten forbidden fruit herself, and tempted her husband to eat it, she would never have complained of her subjection; therefore it ought never to be complained of, though harsh; but sin must be complained of, that made it so. Those wives who not only despise and disobey their husbands, but domineer over them, do not consider that they not only violate a divine law, but thwart a divine sentence. By Matthew Henry, Who is Matthew Henry? | Matthew Henry | Learn to Pray the Bible
• “Your desire shall be for your husband.” Now let’s talk about the word “desire.” What does it mean? It’s an interesting word; it comes from an Arabic root and I have continued to survey this passage because it’s been a passage of some controversy. But it is of Arabic root meaning to seek control. Literally it could read, “You shall seek control over your husband...you will desire to exert your will,” that is a sign of the curse, “you will desire to take charge, to be in control, to master.” And that desire shows up in various women in various ways. In some of them it’s a quiet, silent desire that smolders, with others it is a shouting desire that isn’t much of a secret to anybody. And the more godless women are, very often the more hostile they are toward men. Sometimes that hostility takes the attitude of coldness, indifference, apathy. Because she can’t achieve what she wants, she eventually becomes totally indifferent and apathetic toward the man. But there is this desire, this seeking to have one’s own way, to get control. That’s why there have been through history always Feminist Movements, always. Even in the time of the Apostle Paul. I read some fascinating things about the time of the Apostle Paul. There was a liberation of women movement going on in the world of the Apostle Paul. Women were shaving their heads and going around bare chested with spears in their hands and trying to prove that they can do everything men did. There has always been that kind of movement in history because it’s reflective of this curse. The man has to deal with the fact that his wife wants to control him. By John Macarthur, Grace to You (gty.org)
• Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you: The idea is to contrast the woman’s desire and the husband’s rule over her. This speaks of an inherent challenge in embracing the husband’s role as leader of the home and family. This same word for desire is used in Genesis 4:7 of the desire of sin to master over Cain. Because of the curse, Eve would have to fight a desire to master her husband, a desire that works against God’s ordained order for the home. The principle of Adam’s headship as a husband was established before the fall (see Genesis 2:18 and 2:22). Now the curse on Eve makes it much harder for her to submit and flow with God’s institution of male headship in the home. By David Guzik, Enduring Word - Free Bible Commentary from Pastor David Guzik

“But take heed to your spirit, and do not forsake the wife of your youth. “But if you hate her and send her away,” says the Lord God of Israel, “ungodliness will obscure your thinking,” says the Lord Almighty. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not forsake her.” (Malachi 2:15-16 OSB)

It is obvious from this scripture above that God hates divorce. We can see this to be true as well in Matthew’s gospel which reads: “And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marries her which is put away doth commit adultery.” (Matthew 19:9) So, if a man puts away his faithful wife, it would not only show a lack of honor for her, but would put her in danger of committing adultery as well. Peter said to those of us who are husbands: “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7) So, just because the man has a God given authority over his wife does not mean that she is to be looked down upon or to be treated as inferior.

• Now in Proverbs, it says: “An excellent wife, who can find her? For her worth is far above jewels.” (Proverbs 31:10 NASB20). Yes, a fine wife is priceless and worth much. We see this also to be true where we read: “A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.” (Proverbs 18:22 CSB) So, a woman is to be honored and loved by her husband. For she is a person that is precious and is just as important in the eyes of God as any man. Amen.Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself up for it; ... Even so ought husbands also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his own wife loveth himself: (Ephesians 5:25, 28 ASV)
• So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: (Ephesians 5:28-29 KJV)

"But if anyone does not provide for his own family, especially for his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." (1 Timothy 5:8 CSB)

We already read earlier that the man is to be the head over his wife and children. Therefore, they must be in subjection unto him in all things. So then, a man should also be the main provider for his household as well according to that passage above. For he must do all he can to make sure there is food on the table, a shelter over their heads and clothing on their backs. Of course, the wife plays an important part in this as well. However, the man must make sure that these things for his family are met. In fact, for him to neglect these things would only cause him to be worse than an unbeliever according to what was said above. And let’s also remember that Gods word condemns laziness and anyone who is a slacker. For, “The one who is slack in his work is a brother to one who destroys.” (Proverbs 18:9 NET)

Now, I don’t believe that God is condemning those men who are struggling to make ends meet. For things happen that are outside of their control. But that being said, God will help meet their needs if they trust and rely on Him. So, let us men do our best to love our wives according to scripture and teach are children truth. This we must do without being harsh or provoking them to anger. For God’s word says: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:4 ESV)

• Of course, we must not overlook the other roles that should be done by men. This would include their involvement in the military as well as the police force. These roles should only be done by qualified men who are called to defend both their country and community. I say this because in the bible we read that all military actions were performed by only men. For we read: “Take a census of all the congregation of the people of Israel, by clans, by fathers' houses, according to the number of names, every male, head by head. From twenty years old and upward, all in Israel who are able to go to war, you and Aaron shall list them, company by company. ... So all those listed of the people of Israel, by their fathers’ houses, from twenty years old and upward, every man able to go to war in Israel - all those listed were 603,550.” (Numbers 1:2-3, 45-46 ESV) Then the officers shall speak to the people, saying, ‘Is there any man who has built a new house and has not dedicated it? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man dedicate it. And is there any man who has planted a vineyard and has not enjoyed its fruit? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man enjoy its fruit. And is there any man who has betrothed a wife and has not taken her? Let him go back to his house, lest he die in the battle and another man take her.’ And the officers shall speak further to the people, and say, ‘Is there any man who is fearful and fainthearted? Let him go back to his house, lest he make the heart of his fellows melt like his own.’” (Deuteronomy 20:5-8 ESV)

"Older women likewise are to exhibit behavior fitting for those who are holy, not slandering, not slaves to excessive drinking, but teaching what is good. In this way they will train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, fulfilling their duties at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the message of God may not be discredited." (Titus 2:3-5 NET)

According to the scripture above, older women should be passing on to the younger women the important role of being keepers of the home. However, we see the opposite happening in our generation today. For young women are being shipped off to pursue a degree in some collage. Then, when these same women do marry and become mothers, they end up sending their young children off to some daycare so that they can continue working their career jobs. All this is not consistent with God’s word. For they should they be at home raising and instilling Godly values to their young children instead of letting someone else teach them who know what? Even the military as well as the police force has opened its doors to woman which goes against nature itself. For woman are to bring life into this world, not to take it out.

Unfortunately, this is all part of the fall of mankind. For there are those women who feel they need to prove that they are equal to men within the workforce. But the truth of it is, a woman’s role in the home is more vital and important that anything she can pursue outside it. For she has the God given role to: “Train a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NET) So ladies, what job can be more important than that? Therefore, fulfill your role as a woman which is a blessing from God.

Now, I don’t believe that being “keepers at home” means that a mother must only stay within the confines of their home. For there are family own businesses which they help run. This also would be a great way for their children to get involved, teaching them from a very early age how to be fruitful and productive in life. And there are also those women who choose to be single or have not married yet. These same women can get involved in jobs within their community such as working in nursing home or helping out in some community center. But again, this would all depend on their situation at home. For if a mother or single woman is needed to stay at home, they should forsake whatever job their doing and attended to their family first.

(Please note: Back in the day, children were included within the work force. This groomed them to be productive citizens who will become fruitful in our society. However, our corrupt government system has changed all that. For they think they know better than God when it came down to raising children)

Now, that all being said, I do realize that our corrupt system here in America has made it hard for couples to make it financially with only one person working outside of the home. Unfortunately, we have brought this upon ourselves because of greed. A get rich and let’s retire early mentality can bring a family and nation to ruin. However, as said before, a woman’s first priority is always to be there for her children as well as for her husband. This is not a commandment from me but from God himself as was quoted above in Titus 2:3-5.

"Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor." (1 Timothy 2:11-14 ESV)

It is very clear, both in the Old Testament as well as the New, that the leadership positions in the church are to be held only by men. For this is true as quoted above and also where we read: “Let your women be silent in the assemblies, for it is not permitted to them to speak; but to be in subjection, as the law also says. But if they wish to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is a shame for a woman to speak in assembly.” (1 Corinthians 14:34-35 DBY)

Now, if we look at the Old Testament, we can see that all the priestly positions were only held by men, not woman. For we read: “Now take Aaron your brother, and his sons with him, from among the children of Israel, that he may minister to Me as priest, Aaron [and] Aaron's sons: Nadab, Abihu, Eleazar, and Ithamar.” (Exodus 28:1 NKJV) Likewise, if we look at the New Testament Church, we can see that all twelve of the apostles were men whom Jesus personally chose. So, if Jesus wanted to have women in leadership positions in the New Testament church, wouldn’t he at least have chosen one woman, perhaps maybe Mary Magdalen. But it is clear from Paul’s letters that no woman should take on any form of leadership position within the church assembly. This I believe would be true even if the group is made up of only women.

Now, I know that some of you may be thinking about Deborah, who was: “a prophetess, the wife of Lapidoth, she judged Israel at that time. And she dwelt under the palm tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in mount Ephraim: and the children of Israel came up to her for judgment.” (Judges 4:4-5 KJV) So, while it is true that she was holding these two positions, this still wouldn’t qualify her to be a priest or a religious teacher. Prophets speak as God gives them utterance and Judges administer justice. But that doesn't give them license to take on roles which were not assigned to them. “For every high priest taken from among men is ordained for men in things pertaining to God, that he may offer both gifts and sacrifices for sins: Who can have compassion on the ignorant, and on them that are out of the way; for that he himself also is compassed with infirmity.” (Hebrews 5:1-2 KJV)

And let’s remember that even King Saul, who was an anointed King in Israel, got into trouble for taking on the duties of a Priest. “And Samuel said to Saul, Thou hast done foolishly: thou hast not kept the commandment of the LORD thy God, which he commanded thee: for now would the LORD have established thy kingdom upon Israel for ever. But now thy kingdom shall not continue: the LORD hath sought him a man after his own heart, and the LORD hath commanded him [to be] captain over his people, because thou hast not kept [that] which the LORD commanded thee.” (1 Samuel 13:13-14 KJV) So, even though Saul was King of Israel, he still had no authority to take on the role of a priest, thus he was removed from being the King.

• Commentary Reference:Paul the apostle restricts women from serving as teaching and/or having spiritual authority over men. This precludes women from serving as pastors over men and women, which definitely includes preaching to them, teaching them publicly, and exercising spiritual authority over them.....Did Priscilla and her husband teach the gospel of Jesus Christ to Apollos? Yes, in their home they “explained to him the way of God more adequately” (Acts 18:26). Does the Bible ever say that Priscilla pastured a church or taught publicly or became the spiritual leader of a congregation of saints? No. As far as we know, Priscilla was not involved in ministry activity in contradiction to (1 Timothy 2:11–14). In Romans 16:1, Phoebe is called a “deacon” (or “servant”) in the church and is highly commended by Paul. But, as with Priscilla, there is nothing in Scripture to indicate that Phoebe was a pastor or a teacher of men or even of women in the church. “Able to teach” is given as a  qualification for elders, but not for deacons (1 Timothy 3:1–13; Titus 1:6–9). The structure of 1 Timothy 2:11–14 makes the reason why women cannot be pastors perfectly clear. Verse 13 begins with “for,” giving the “cause” of Paulʼs statement in verses 11–12. Why should women not teach or have authority over men? Because “Adam was created first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived” (verses 13–14). God created Adam first and then created Eve to be a “helper” for Adam. The order of creation has universal application in the family (Ephesians 5:22–33) and in the church. Many women excel in gifts of hospitality, mercy, teaching, evangelism, and helps. Much of the ministry of the local church depends on women deacons. Women in the church are not restricted from public praying or prophesying (1 Corinthians 11:5), only from having spiritual teaching authority over men and women within the confines of a church. The Bible nowhere restricts women from exercising the gifts of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 12). Women, just as much as men, are called to minister to others, to demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23), and to proclaim the gospel to the lost (Matthew 28:18–20; Acts 1Y8; 1 Peter 3:15). God has ordained that only men are to serve in positions of spiritual teaching authority in the church...... Men are to set the example in spiritual leadership—in their lives and through their words. Women are to take a less authoritative role. Women are encouraged to teach younger women their roles in life (Titus 2:3–5). The Bible also does not restrict women from teaching children. The only activity women are restricted from is teaching or having spiritual authority over men. This precludes women from serving as pastors to men. This does not make women less important, by any means, but rather gives them a ministry focus more in agreement with Godʼs plan and His gifting of them. - Two Views on Women in Ministry, Revised by James R. Beck, ed. and Logos Bible Software. (Gotquestions.org)

• That being all said, the scriptures do teach that women can take part within the church as prophets and deacons. For we can see this to be true where we read: “The deaconesses too must be serious, not gossips; they must be temperate and perfectly trustworthy.” (1 Timothy 3:11 Williams) We see this again were we read: “I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a deaconess of the church at Cen'chre-ae, that you may receive her in the Lord as befits the saints, and help her in whatever she may require from you, for she has been a helper of many and of myself as well.” (Romans 16:1-2 RSV) Now it must be understood that this word deacon (and Deaconesses) does not mean a church leader or teacher but one who serves in the church. For in Acts 6:3, Stephen was appointed as a deacon in the church to serve tables, but not to teach.1 Timothy 3:11 = “the women,” that is, the deaconesses. For there is no reason that special rules should be laid down as to the wives of the deacons, and not also as to the wives of the bishops or overseers. Moreover, if the wives of the deacons were meant, there seems no reason for the omission of “their” (not in the Greek). Also the Greek for “even so” (the same as for “likewise,” 1Timothy 3:8, and “in like manner,” 1Timathy 2:9), denotes a transition to another class of persons. Further, there were doubtless deaconesses at Ephesus, such as Phoebe was at Cenchrea (Romans 16:1, “servant,” Greek, “deaconess”), - Naturally after specifying the qualifications of the deacon, Paul passes to those of the kindred office, the deaconess. Jamieson-Fausset-Brown Commentary
• And it shall come to pass in the last days, saith God, I will pour out of my Spirit upon all flesh: and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams: And on my servants and on my handmaidens I will pour out in those days of my Spirit; and they shall prophesy: (Acts 2:17-18 KJV)

 Below is the different bible versions used in this article. This I did in to help you in your study of God’s word. Therefore, I encourage you to: “Study to show thyself approved to God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15 WEB)

• KJV = The Authorized Version or King James Version (KJV), 1611, 1769. Outside of the United Kingdom, the KJV is in the public domain. Within the United Kingdom, the rights to the KJV are vested in the Crown.
• ESV = The Holy Bible, English Standard Version copyright © 2001, 2007, 2011, 2016 by Crossway Books and Bibles, a Publishing Ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
• CSB = Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017, 2020 by Holman Bible Publishers.
• NET = The NET Bible®, New English Translation Copyright © 1996 By Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. NET Bible® is a registered trademark The NET Bible® Logo, Service Mark Copyright © 1997 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. All rights reserved.
• NKJV = Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
• ASV = New American Standard Bible Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, Calif. All rights reserved.
• NASB20 = New American Standard Bible 2020 Copyright (c) 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, Calif. All rights reserved.
• DBY = In 1867, John Nelson Darby translated the New Testament from Greek into English. Further revisions were done in 1872 and 1884. Darby’s work was first published as The Holy Scriptures: A New Translation from the Original Languages by J. N. Darby. After Darby’s death in 1882, some of his students worked together to produce the complete Darby Bible based on the Masoretic Hebrew text, Darby’s German (Elberfelder), and the French (Pau) translations.In 1890, the first complete Darby Bible was published in English. This translation of the Bible is in the public domain.
• WEB = The Webster Bible was translated by Noah Webster in 1833 in order to bring the language of the bible up to date. This version of the Bible is in the public domain.
• RSV = The Holy Bible: Revised Standard Version containing the Old and New Testaments, translated from the original tongues: being the version set forth A.D. 1611, revised A.D. 1881-1885 and A.D. 1901: compared with the most ancient authorities and revised A.D. 1946-52. — 2nd ed. of New Testament A.D. 1971. There should be enough in the rest of the description to identify the text.
• NIV = THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by Permission of Biblica, Inc.® All rights reserved worldwide.
• Williams = Williams New Testament. Published in 1937; public domain.
• OSB = The Orthodox Study Bible. Copyright © 2008 by St. Athanasius of Orthodox Theology.

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To the Reader: It is my intention to remind you, my fellow Christians, of what God’s word says concerning raising children. For we are to teach them straight from the womb to know God and to be respectable citizens. That’s because the first few years of a child’s life are the most important in their development. Therefore, whether you’re a parent, grandparent, older sibling, babysitter, teacher, or one who has the opportunity to say a few words of wisdom, we should: “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NKJV) God help us all to do just that. Amen.

“That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.” (Titus 2:2-8 KJV)

According to that passage above, we should be teaching our children God’s truths. This we must do by educating them to be fruitful and productive individuals. Young boys at a very early age should be nurtured and guided for a future career that will help them be able to support a family as well as be beneficial to their society. Likewise, young girls should be taught what it takes to be a good wife and how to raise a family. But most of all, we should be teaching them about our Awesome God and Creator, showing them from birth what Christianity is all about. This can even start when they're still in the womb, singing and reading the bible out loud to them. And let’s not forget to cover them in prayers as well.

But what’s really happening in our homes? Well, there are those mindless video games and action movies that put nonsense and violence into kids’ heads. And then we wonder why our youth are numb to violence and are killing each other in schools. Also, there are those silly cartoons, kid shows, Disney movies, and foolish games that they’re being entertained with. Parents as well as our society are teaching and training children to be a bunch of goofballs instead of nurturing them to be productive citizens. Unfortunately, we can see our world starting to reflect this nonsense that’s being taught. And yes, let’s not forget about the Smart Phone addiction that’s captivating not only our youth, but many adults as well. And if that’s not bad enough, we now got a society that’s not only confused over their own gender, but they’re brainwashing young children to be confused over theirs as well.

So, God’s word say to all parents: “And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be upon thy heart; and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thy house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thy hand, and they shall be for frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the door-posts of thy house, and upon thy gates.” (Deuteronomy 6:6-9 KJV)

Below is website concerning child development in their early years:

• https://www.firstthingsfirst.org/early-childhood-matters/brain-development/

Now, let’s consider the child Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (whom we know as Mozart). He, even at the age of four, not only already new how to play different instruments, such as the piano and the violin, but also composed his first piano concerto. Leopold Mozart, who was his father and teacher, regarded the blots of ink put down on paper by the unskilled hand of a child with disbelief, realizing that all notes were correctly arranged following contemporary musical rules. From this time on he also taught his son the art of composing: Wolfgang played the melodies on the piano and his father put the notes down on paper. Wolfgang also himself enjoyed singing, a passion that would be his companion for the rest of his life.

So, I don't think this child was fed a bunch of nonsense like most kids get today, but was trained in the “way he should go.” And we can see this to be true with Johann Sebastian Bach and George Frederic Handel as well. All these men were not only musicians at a young age, but were involved with the church of their day. Therefore, fellow Christians, let’s STOP raising our children on worldly nonsense. For we need to raise them as productive citizens who will bare much fruit in this life.

Now, we come to the important subject of disciplining our children. For it seems our society today thinks it knows better than God on how to correct children. For His word tells us not to spare the rod of correction, for in applying it you’re actually showing more love than you would if you withheld it. But unfortunately, you can get into big trouble if you take a switch to your child these days. Again, this is because of our corrupt governmental system that thinks they know better than God. But the truth is, all of us were born sinners. Therefore, we need to discipline our children when they get out of hand. For: “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” (Proverbs 22:15 KJV) So that being said, let’s stop encouraging are children in the ways of foolishness and instead make them sound Godly people.

Below are a few more scriptures from the Bible that speak on correction:

• "The one who will not use the rod hates his son, but the one who loves him disciplines him diligently.” (Proverbs 13:24 CSB)
• “Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to the words of knowledge. (Proverbs 23:12 NET)
• “The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.” (Proverbs 29:15 ESV)

Below is an article touching on the nonsense of our justice system:

• According to Fox News Latino – In Corpus Christi Texas, A mom was sentenced to probation and has lost custody of her children for spanking her daughter. The article said: Rosalina Gonzales of Corpus Christi pleaded guilty on Wednesday to injury to a child for swatting the 2-year-old on her buttocks. According to prosecutors, Gonzales in December hit the girl with an open hand, leaving red marks. Police arrested Gonzales after the childʼs grandmother reported the injuries and took the child to a hospital. Gonzales will serve five yearsʼprobation, take parenting classes and follow guidelines laid out by Child Protective Services. KZTV10.com reports that the ruling judge in the case make it clear that spanking is a crime. “You donʼt spank children today.”Judge Jose Longoria is quoted as having said. “In the old days, maybe we got spanked, but there was different quarrel. You donʼt spank children.” Published June 21, 2011 / Fox News Latino

Now, there is one last thing I want to touch on, and that is sex education. For I believe the vast majority of parents have failed their children by not educating them about sex. For how many of you have actually talked to your children about sex, explaining to them the role of sex in marriage? So, by hiding or refusing to talk about it can make sex appear dirty or wrong. Well, didn’t God ordain sex in the first place, telling us to be fruitful and multiply? So, why do we find it so difficult to educate them in this very important part of life? And the truth is, they’re going to find out about it one way or another. So, wouldn’t it be best that you teach them the do’s and don’ts of sex while they're still young? For we need to remember that God’s word say to “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NKJV)

Again, in Deuteronomy 6:7 it says to teach them when you’re lying down, and rising up as well. Therefore, teaching them about sex at an early age will help them be ready when they find a mate. Now, I'm not suggesting that you have an open-door policy and let your children watch you have sex. For it's true that you could end up in jail and have their children taken from as well. But that being said, you shouldn’t panic if a child does happen to walk in on you while they’re in act. For this will only convey the false message that sex is dirty and wrong. For this could be a good time to tell them how babies are made.

Therefore, it’s time for parent to step up and teach them God’s truths about sex before they learn it outside the home environment. And please don’t rely on our corrupt school system to teach your children about sex. For we need to stand up against those in our government who think they know better than God. For to fail teaching your children in this area of life could only bring hardship, not only on your child when he get older, but on you the parent as well.

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NIV)

Now, for all you parents who are reading this. Do you really think that getting your children hocked on sports is going to be a better person? Also, the chances of them ever making it to pro is very slim. So instead, shouldn't you be training children in some kind of skill or trade that is going to be a blessing not only to them, but to others as well? For according to that passage above, you are either going to train them to be fruitful and productive, or to be prideful and thus seeking after vain glory. Because if you don’t teach them the right way to go, you may surely regret it later on. I say this because I witnessed the suffering that a Christian family went through after their son got injured while playing High School football. And because of his suffering, he eventually took his own life. More on this below.

Below are some articles showing tragedy concerning High School football:

• 7 middle and high school football deaths in a month
•  Experts Alarmed Over 13 High School Football Deaths This Season 
•  We Had No Idea This Many Kids Have Died Playing High School Football This Year 

Let’s dare to stand on God’s word and not follow man’s false teachings. Let’s use God given wisdom and discernment in everything we do, relying on the Holy Spirit to be our teacher. For: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13 NKJV). Amen.

• Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him? For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him. (Genesis 18:18-19 KJV)
• Only take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life: but teach them thy sons, and thy sons' sons; Specially the day that thou stoodest before the LORD thy God in Horeb, when the LORD said unto me, Gather me the people together, and I will make them hear my words, that they may learn to fear me all the days that they shall live upon the earth, and that they may teach their children. (Deuteronomy 4:9-10 KJV)
• And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates. (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)
• Give ear, O my people, to my teaching; incline your ears to the words of my mouth! I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings from of old, things that we have heard and known, that our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments; and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God. (Psalm 78:1-8 ESV)
• And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4 NKJV)

Below is a list of the bible versions that were used in this article. I listed these to help you in your study of God’s word.

• KJV = The Authorized Version or King James Version (KJV), 1611, 1769. Outside of the United Kingdom, the KJV is in the public domain. Within the United Kingdom, the rights to the KJV are vested in the Crown.
• ESV = The Holy Bible, English Standard Version copyright © 2001, 2007, 2011, 2016 by Crossway Books and Bibles, a Publishing Ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
• CSB = Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017, 2020 by Holman Bible Publishers.
• NET = The NET Bible®, New English Translation Copyright © 1996 By Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. NET Bible® is a registered trademark The NET Bible® Logo, Service Mark Copyright © 1997 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. All rights reserve.
• NKJV = Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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